WTF Happens Here (Applesauce & Shiz)

It's not a myth - Most kids hate vegetables!

Notice I didn't say "all" and I do love how I hear more & more these days about youngens loving their vegetables, but in my opinion this is kind of like a new trend such as the whole foods craze, because growing up when I did you signed the petition & hopped on the anti-vegetable committee, if only in your mind, but you still made a pact with yourself.

I remember my grandmother in Florida threatening me to eat her string beans as I cried & pouted & rebelled for over two hours.

I think I eventually ended up snorting some up my nose in dismay.

(Not limited to just veggies...)

Things like applesauce, Spinach, Squash, Zucchini, Tapioca, and Kidney Beans made me want to cry at the mere thought of them.

Things like turnip were unheard of, but you'd give the word a lil giggle

("Mofos & old people food." That's what you were thinking, right?)

And now?........

NOW?!?

Better watch your back cause I'll come up on your ass in the grocery store & run you down on one of them scooters like Santa on the way to his Amphetamine dealer.

Gimme all your vegetables!

This dude's packing some serious drugs in those boxes, not dollies & chocolates.

I've come for your brussels sprouts.

Just kidding. I don't even like brussell sprouts. 

I'll never like those. I'm not that crazy.

In fact, brussels sprouts & cabbage should get together for a suicide orgy.
I'm pretty sure brussels sprouts are actually just the evil demon spawns of the unholy that is cabbage.

I'm also pretty sure this is what an adult candy store looks like...

Not even sure if they both are cabbage. Who cares, it is the Antichrist.

But my taste buds go into frenzies for crisp, fresh bell peppers, tomato slices, stalks of celery, grilled asparagus & corn, piles of plain, boiled spinach with nothing on it.

It goes deeper - I require applesauce. I wouldn't be insane enough to have pork chops without it.

I love tapioca balls, and I so have to refrain from making a statement here about them in my mouth.

(*Wipes sweat off brow*)

I didn't......but I like, did......Know what I mean?

But back to the topic at hand, could you pass me those turnips? Because I seem to have left my entire dinner just to eat the whole bowl.

In fact, every thing's dead in the garden because I was out there earlier eating all the seedlings out of the ground like a fuckin' Brontosaurus.

More re-fried beans, please!!

How long before I'm using my senior discount card to enjoy a nice, cold prune juice on tap?

Maybe garnished with a radish. *Vomit*

It kind of just progresses- Loving the things we once had an absolute hatred for as we grow older.

And you know it goes much deeper than vegetables because it's happened to you too.

Don't deny it. We all have things we love that we once hated or turned us off.

Now I'm thinking I should cut this off before it goes where the tapioca thing went...

Ever had something you've grown more fond of that you maybe once despised?

(Did you hate your damn veggies? Did you snort pole beans? Cause I totally didn't, although I can't remember what had happened to those things that night. The trauma that was blanked it out.)

Or better yet, some tastes you just know will never change for you? Like cabbage & lentils.

Could you hand me that bag please?  Thanks.