Showing posts with label Surveys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Surveys. Show all posts

Monday, January 24, 2011

Tagged & Tea Bagged

 So I've been tagged to answer some survey questions by my good friend Kelly of the one & only delightfully entertaining Psycho Carnival.

And just recently here I've spoken of my inability to answer questions seriously.


Right now I'm like a mechanically separated chicken. Something's pulling my leg one way, my opposite arm another, eventually leading to my head being pulled through & out of my ass.

I can do all kinds of tricks.

As tempted as I am to quell my thirst for insanity, I have a need for an equal balance of normalcy, so I'm going to let people in a lil more on my "normal" & serious side for this one. Though that still starts to fade toward the end here.

Like to hear it, here it go........

1. If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or are they members of your family?
  
It depends on how much beastiality & incest is going on there. 

Seriously, my pets are the "wuvs of my wife" I call em', but technically they're not my pets anymore. They've been claimed by my parents dwelling because it's where they grew up, but we live in the same duplex so I can see them as often & conveniently as I like. 

There's Shoobie, a 16 y/o Jack Russell/Border Collie, and Nonna, a 10 y/o Tabby cat whom I swear could both get me to jump out in front of a moving car with their adorable lil faces & my love for them. They are my babies. The two darlings that never fail to make me smile or laugh in a dark moment.

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
  
Very simple. Just to get on with living my ideal visions of my future & living it to the fullest. 

3. What is the one thing most hated by you?

We cannot go with just on here, sorry. These are the things I've always hated most.

Like Kelly, I have to put Conformity at the top of that list.  
The pain & unhappiness of other people.
People who are just shit, plain & simple 
Injustice 
Dishonesty
Stupidity in people who don't have to be stupid isn't as much hated by me as it just scares the crap out of me.
Lameness


4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

 Set up my family, friends, and myself for life, put aside a hefty savings, & invest the rest in helpful, worthwhile causes.

5. What helps to pull you out of a bad mood? 

Laughs, comedy, the joys & comforts of my home, my friends, adventure, snuggly things, and love. 

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?

Being loved by someone. We can blindly love any idiot, but it doesn't mean a damn thing if we're not truly loved in return. That's when you're abusing yourself, and loving yourself enough is # 1.

7. What is your bedtime routine?

Self-medicating, winding down with Comedy Central, usually a small bowl of some kind of berry, grape, or cherry, getting into either pink striped fuzzy PJ pants, pant-ies or short cotton shorts, a baby tee, tank or some type of top that just covers my lady bits (depending on the weather), diving into down blankets & pillows & rolling around, making giddy sounds & talking to a monkey. I am just like a lil kid at bedtime who's all happy about bedtime.

8. If you are currently in a relationship, how did you meet your partner?
  
I was in a relationship from 1997-2008. Thankfully, I am currently not once again with the wrong person, or any right now for that matter because most of them are wrong for me. I don't settle anymore. I'm in it to win it & make sure it's worthy of lasting forever.

9. If you could watch a creative person in the act of the creative process, who would it be?

Sadly, I cannot watch Pablo Picasso paint, or Edgar Allen Poe with a quill in the middle of an epiphany, or Da Vinci design the first flying machine, nor Syd Barrett writing The Piper at the Gates of Dawn or Saucerful of Secrets (I'm a classic kind of gal), so I'll have to go with watching any amazing painter create a masterpiece from start to finish. I never got the point in observing paintings, but now I LOVE it. You have to wonder about every part of the creation process, so it's something I love to watch.

10. What kinds of books do you read?

Mostly informational books on Sciences, horticulture, astrology; books that teach me about my never ending interests. Too much ADD for long stories & in depth novels.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?

In a great marriage, in a great home, with a great family & my great closest friends.  

12. What’s your fear?

The deaths of my loved ones.  Couldn't imagine a world without them & I don't know how I'll ever cope & not fall to pieces with the inevitable.

13. Would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to visit outer space?

Here's the thing - It's not an issue for me to give up junk food, but space scares the shit out of me!!  

I respect it, I am completely awed & amazed by it & it's beauty & wonder, but I'm pretty damn cozy where I am & have no desire to shoot off into an infinite void in a Jiffy Pop suit, hearing creepy humpback wale sounds, floating in an atmosphere in which the pressure could blow my fucking head off, or suck me into a black hole like being enveloped by the asshole of Sally Struthers.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married, but poor?

Love trumps money hands down, as long as there is real love.  If there's no love & all misery, that's just a double shitstorm.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Grab my iPhone & run to the bathroom to be annoyed at my bladder.  
(Really no better time to check your emails than when you're taking a tinkle) 
Then I have a crack fit for coffee that would scare Alfred Hitchcock. 

16. If you could change one thing about your spouse/partner what would it be?

Probably the speed settings.  

17. If you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?

Aah, I've thought about this lately. Right now it's Aphrodite. Haha!
(Tomorrow it could be Fred. I'm spontaneous like that.)

 
18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?

Most things I will forgive. It's the fact that I refuse to forget, as should everyone always, that could still leave the other party screwed in my eyes. Forgiving is the act of letting go of the past, understanding human nature at it's deepest, most primal level. Never forgetting is the act of self-love, self-worth, and self-protection.  

19. If you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?

Avocados. They're my favorite & have one of the largest percentages of nutrients I'd need.

So, I'm guessing I have to tag 4 other bloggers here, and if you are tagged, of course you are by no means required to take the survey, and I won't feel offended in the least if you don't ;~}, but I'll still pass on the opportunity to some of my favs & new favs if they'd like to take it.


The survey questions:

1. If you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or are they members of your family?
2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
3. What is the one thing most hated by you?
4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
5. What helps to pull you out of a bad mood?
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
7. What is your bedtime routine?
8. If you are currently in a relationship, how did you meet your partner?
9. If you could watch a creative person in the act of the creative process, who would it be?
10. What kinds of books do you read?
11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
12. What’s your fear?
13. Would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to visit outer space?
14. Would you rather be single and rich or married, but poor?
15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
16. If you could change one thing about your spouse/partner what would it be?
17. If you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?
18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?
19. If you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?


And thanks again to Kelly for passing on the opportunity to me, and just for being him.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

You Be Serious

I'll be Charlie.
Because sometimes I just find it hard to be # 1, esp. when answering a bunch of questions....
So I answered a bunch of questions with absolutely NO fucking substance, at ALL, validating this very statement.....

I Am
The Real McCoy

I Want 
A rainbow margarita that shot out of a unicorn's ass.

I Have 
No idea wtf #1 means.
(Strike that. I just found out. Yeah, I'm that.  Thank you, our lord Google. Thou shalt guide us into the apocalypse & explode into the sun. *Salutes* Look, I was never fucking good with that whole religion thing. But now I suddenly want some bread.)

I Wish
I had a room wall to wall with down pillows, blankets, & stuffed animals to have adult tea parties with.
(Mr. Lizard & I would laugh till the fn sun came up. Remind me to put a lizard in there.)

I Hate 
When I honk a clown in all the right spots & he doesn't call me in the morning.

I Fear 
An army of giant mechanical robots, or dinosaurs... Or worse; either one in suits & ties with very bad hair dos, like government officials.

I Hear 
Elvis. He talks to me a lot. I love that funny fuckin' bastard.

I Search 
The plains for my detachable penis.

I Wonder 
Why they call it Wonder bread.

I Regret  
Not having any regrets.

I Love 
Shaved genitals, classic rock, kink, & berries.

I ache
That they call muenster cheese muenster cheese. I think I may have tourette's, or something like it.
.

I Always 
Go from left to right. Though, sometimes I go down > up, and feel like such a rebel all day.

I Usually  
Masturbate at an angle.

I Am Not 
Taking out your fucking trash! Take it out yourself, asshole.

I Dance 
On Sprockets, every Saturday night, since they cancelled American Bandstand.

I Sing 
Just like Fiona Apple in my mind. But probably something like Bruce Springsteen in reality.

I Never 
Try to operate chainsaws in the dark. We should put a stop to this madness!

I Rarely 
Know how to answer this effing question.

I Cry  
Chocolate sprinkles, and shit strawberry fluff.

I Am Not Always 
Temperamental. They take me to the vet for shots.

I Lose 
My innocence every time I wake up.

I'm Confused 
On what Lady GaGa came from

I Need 
Valium,or Aderall. No one can figure it out yet.

I Should 
Be myself, no matter what anyone thinks, and omfg, finish the laundry!

I Dream
Of terrible things. TERRIBLE THINGGSS! *Strobes Barbara Streisand Visuals*


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